Fatuity at its finest

Women are finding it more acceptable to have an abortion than to drift into an unplanned pregnancy, the head of Britain's leading abortion agency said yesterday.

Excuse me? If she's getting an abortion, she has already "drifted into an unplanned pregnancy." Women who aren't pregnant generally don't submit to abortions.

And I like the "drift into." It's not like she actually does anything to precipitate the pregnancy in question. She just "drifts into" it. You know, the way a rudderless sailboat drifts onto a sandbar. It's not like the women in question have any control of their lives and their choices. They're just blown hither and thither, hapless and helpless.

"Parenting is considered to be very important and is taken seriously these days," she said.

Yeah, and all the generations of women who came before saw motherhood as trivial and frivolous.

"[Y]ou could argue that among many groups of people in society abortion is seen as a more responsible response to being a victim of uncontrolled fertility," she said.

So women who get pregnant when they didn't intend to do are just "victims of uncontrolled fertility." Who, pray tell, failed to control the fertility in question? Maybe the women who didn't take their fertility seriously until they got pregnant. Who thought that this powerful force of nature could be controlled as easily as popping a pill every morning. Who thought that separating sex from procreation -- overriding possibly the most powerful biological force in the universe -- was a matter of course.

Watch out! "Uncontrolled fertility" is lurking in closets like the Bogeyman, leaping out and victimizing unsuspecting women!

And how can you square the whole "sexual empowerment" concept with the woman being a hapless victim of her own body's natural functions? "It's my evil ovaries! They're out to get me!"

This one wins the "Paging Captain Obvious" Award:

The BPAS says that the opportunity to get pregnant is greater as more women are sexually active for longer, with no intention of starting a family. Contraception could fail and couples would sometimes fail to use contraception.

Gosh, I'd never have made the connection between having sex when you don't want to get pregnant and getting pregnant when you don't want to be. Not. This ain't rocket science, lady.

Read it all here.