Tuesday, June 08, 2010

The pervert and the pencil abortion and how it's all our fault

Jill Stanek has an interesting bit about a creepy pervert who was sexually abusing a 13-year-old girl (who had been doing so since she was 12), and who hid the body of her stillborn baby when she performed a self-abortion with a lead pencil.

Jill Stanek points out that Jill at Feministe blames the prolifers, for, among other things, not impressing upon the girl that she was entitled to "pleasure" and "autonomy".

Excuse me? It was getting suckered by a 31-year-old man who promised her pleasure and the illusion of autonomy that got her into this mess to begin with!

And how would a visit to a fly-by-night have improved the situation? They'd have scraped her out and returned her to her abuser.

Maybe teaching girls that there is more to life than being "hot", getting "pleasure", and demonstrating their "maturity" by spreading their legs might go further to prevent these hideous scenarios.

We need to be teaching our kids, from a very young age, that the ability to *abstain from sex* is a mark of maturity. Anybody with hormones can cave in and rut like a weasel. It takes a lot of maturity to tell your hormones to shut up while you get on with getting an education and building strong relationships based on something more substantial than what Robert A. Heinlein called "the slippery friction of mucous membranes."

Yeah, society let this girl down. But not by a *failure* to encourage her to think with her crotch.

17 comments:

OperationCounterstrike said...

I think you've missed the point.

The reason this girl endangered her life is, she was afraid if she went to a doctor, she and her boyfriend would get reported to the police.

This is why doctors need TOTAL confidentiality rights--the right to guarantee absolute secrecy to every patient (unless the patient intends to harm another person).

This case argues against mandatory reporting laws.

OperationCounterstrike said...

RE: "And how would a visit to a [confidential abortion clinic] have improved the situation? They'd have scraped her out and returned her to her abuser. "

At least that way she wouldn't have been sticking pencils into her vagina.

Katie said...

Yes, protect the abuser so he can go on raping little girls. Wonderful.

OperationCounterstrike said...
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OperationCounterstrike said...

Katie, THIS GIRL COULD HAVE DIED because she was afraid to go to a doctor. And she was afraid to go to a doctor because of mandatory reporting laws.

This is what happens when you interfere with medical confidentiality.

Dealing with the abuser is a job for the police. Not for doctors. The doctors' job is to take care of the patients.

If you try to make docs do the cops' jobs, you get patients afraid to go to doctors, which means, dead patients.

THIS CASE is why we oppose parental-notification laws, and parental-consent laws. We oppose these laws IN ORDER TO PREVENT PATIENTS FROM SELF-ABORTING AND KILLING THEMSELVES.

Of course you don't care. You probably think this girl deserved to die. Wages of sin, right?

anna said...

OK, OP-C -
When doctors strongly suspect or know of physical abuse of children by parents, they are obligated to report it; heavens, I know of a dr. reporting abuse of a spouse even though he couldn't actually have the offender arrested. Should we not have dr.'s report physical abuse, then, in the hopes that more parents will bring their abused children to the dr. after they hurt them? Of course not!
Exceptions to the law do not prove the point. And to be fair, RealChoice, while I usually agree with you, there should not be any assertion that this girl deserved what happened to her. I doubt it was any notion of sexual liberty which held her this horrid situation; it was probably a twisted notion of love and sense of worthlessness.
The sooner she would have talked to an adult who could have reported the illegal relationship, ie a school counselor or dr., the sooner she would have realized just how badly she was being treated and gotten legal protection. It is tragic that there was no report of abuse until this decision to self-abort was made; but just think, if OP-C had his way, the dr.'s at the hospital needn't have concerned themselves with reporting this creep even after she severely injured herself!
ABUSE MUST NEVER BE TOLERATED.

Lilliput said...

What has happened to the perpetrator now that the story is out?

Kathy said...

Lil, the article in the link says: "Lisk was arrested and arraigned before Magisterial District Judge Michael Muth and placed in Monroe County Correctional Facility in lieu of $50,000 bail. Lisk is charged with rape of a child, statutory sexual assault, involuntary deviate sexual intercourse, aggravated indecent assault, corruption of a minor, concealing the death of a child and abuse of a corpse."

Kathy said...

RealChoice, while I usually agree with you, there should not be any assertion that this girl deserved what happened to her.
I don't see anything in what Christina said to imply in any way that this girl deserved what happened to her.

I doubt it was any notion of sexual liberty which held her this horrid situation; it was probably a twisted notion of love and sense of worthlessness.
I totally agree with the second part of this, but think that the "notion of sexual liberty" was indeed involved in her "twisted notion of love." It is interesting that a "sense of worthlessness" is both the cause and effect of early sexual activity in girls. You can read Dr. Meg Meeker's book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters for more information on this; but basically, girls go looking for love and acceptance that they (for whatever reason) haven't found in their fathers (or father-figure), so they look to other males for it.

army_wife said...

Kathy, what you are talking about really hits home for me - I had these same experiences as a teen. These statements are very true.

I wish there were a way to spare other girls from the things I experienced - always seeking love, acceptance, and self-worth and finding out the hard way that the things our society says should give us these really just destroy us even more.

L. said...

"Anybody with hormones can cave in and rut like a weasel."

You know, I don't always agree with this -- sex is a very big deal, and people should have it only when they're ready, and sometimes being ready involves lost of careful thought and preparation -- which is much, much more than just "caving in."

GrannyGrump said...

But it takes the maturity to WAIT. Waiting is not caving in. Granted, you're advocating waiting until "they're ready" -- which can merely be "drunk enough". But there's still at least some discretion. Which is something our hook-up society frowns on.

Rachael said...
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Rachael said...

So it's our fault this young woman made a conscious and poor decision to shove a pencil up her vagina instead of seeking help from the various social and community resources available to her, to both help her with her social-economic situation and pregnancy? Normally I would be advocating personal responsibility in a situation such as this, instead of finger pointing (as pro-choicers have done), but at the same time, I see her as a victim, considering that she was in abusive relationship with an influential, older male, and she being relatively young, lacked the maturity and insight to seek help for her pregnancy or to realize that she was being taken advantage of by this man, not exactly a strong opposing argument to mandatory reporting of abuse laws or parental notification laws. Teens such as these need our protection, not their abuser!

GrannyGrump said...

A lot of the problem goes back to the fact that society (and the acolytes of Planned Parenthood) taught this girl that when a man wants to have sex with you, that is a measure of your worth, and that you prove your worth by going along with it. If we taught kids that love often means restraint, she might have had a chance to see the sexual abuse for what it was, instead of believing that it meant she was special and loved. And THERE is where a lot of the fault lies. In the myth that "love" is best and most purely expressed hormonally.

Sometimes, yes, love is expressed sexually, but if that "love" puts the other at risk, IT'S NOT LOVE. It's abuse.

Rupert said...

'...society (and the acolytes of Planned Parenthood) taught this girl that when a man wants to have sex with you, that is a measure of your worth, and that you prove your worth by going along with it...' - if I was associated with Planned Parenthood I would seriously contemplate legal action against you for this spurious, non-evidential assertion.

Rachael said...

if I was associated with Planned Parenthood I would seriously contemplate legal action against you for this spurious, non-evidential assertion.

Oh much like the spurious, non-evidential assertions, stereotyps you've come here and spouted against me and other pro-life individuals? Pot meet kettle...

*begin sarcasm* Oh that's right, we're not allowed to have free speech, an opinion, and our experience doesn't it matter, unless it agrees with the pro-choice viewpoint *end sarcasm*

Free speech for me, but not for thee!