Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Words from Marla's Mom

This is a letter Debbie Cardamone wrote after attending a previous "March for Choice" counterprotest in DC. I've offered to publish it here as part of my pledge to Marla's parents to see that their daughter is not forgotten, and that she will not have died in vain.

WHAT YOU DIDN''T SEE IN WASHINGTON DC, Women Saving Lives, March for choice

I made the trip to Washington, DC because I felt compelled to speak out for the hundreds of women who have no voice. My daughter, Marla, died from a legal abortion in 1989. She died a horrific death in a Woman's Hospital in Pittsburgh. So much for safe, legal abortion. I remember specifically that no women's group called to express their outrage or to offer their sympathy. So much for the "sisterhood" that NOW and Planned Parenthood say exists and is their cornerstone that they have built the feminist movement upon.

When Goergette Forney, co- founder of the Silent No More Awareness Campaign, invited me to join their prayerful protest I felt it was time for me to speak for myself and not be represented by the pro-choice feminists such as, PLANNED PARENTHOOD, NOW and NARAL. I was especially anxious not to be represented by Hillary Clinton and the Hollywood pro-abortion community. What do they care about the women who have died and the families they left behind to grieve for their daughters and grandchildren ? They would just prefer to have business as usual. Just as long as you hand them the money, you are pushed through the system and you have no support after the pain of your abortion takes over every aspect of your life, whether it be physical, mental, emotional or spiritual.

Silent No More Awareness provides the love and support women need after the effects of their abortion begin to take hold of their hearts and push them into depression and destructive behavior.We are NOT a political movement, just a prayerful witness to those women who are seeking the truth. Our signs are simple. "I regret my abortion" and "Women deserve better than abortion" and "women need love not abortion". My sign was the only one that was different. It was a tombstone poster that read, "Women Killed By Legal Abortion". On the poster there is a list of women who were murdered and left unaccounted for, including Marla and over 400 other daughters who have families that grieve for them everyday.

Before we were scheduled to arrive in Washington, we were denied our First Amendment rights by Judge Gladys Kessler. Silent No More Awareness had applied for a permit to gather directly across the street from the National Mall. I guess they were afraid of women who were gathering to peacefully protest and to give silent witness to those in pain. I guess they were afraid that our signs would be an open invitation for women to feel free to talk about their private pain. I guess that they didn't want women to find hope and healing in God's abundant love for all of His daughters. Isn't that really what choice is all about? I guess in Washington there is only one choice for Judge Kessler and the feminists she represents.

Campaign co-founder and Associate director of Priests for Life, Janet Morana questions their motives. "Isn't this hypocritical, marching for total access to abortion for all women while denying some women access to speak on public sidewalks?" President of NOEL , and Co-founder of the campaign, Georgette Forney stated, "It's ironic that they are marching to protect women's right to choose and at the same time working to deny us our right to talk about the pain abortion caused us. We are the faces of the choice they promote."

We arrived in Washington around noon and we were divided into three groups. We were given specific instructions on what we could expect and what was expected of us. We were to remain SILENT, no matter what was said or what was done to provoke any type of angry response. We were to remain dignified and respectful in our attempt to keep this a prayerful protest. We all understand the reason for such anger and we understand very well the pain that can distort a woman's heart. What we weren't prepared for was the violence and viciousness of these pro-choice women. We only understood that we were in some danger after we were on the corner of 7th and Constitution Ave. With a police guard directly in front of us, we watched the beginning of what I can only describe as a combination of Marilyn Manson meets the circus. Young men dressed as terrorists banging drums stood in a line directly in front of us as young women danced in a very suggestive and sexual manner. They were chanting about masturbation and encouraging all to try a gay lifestyle. To further make their point, two young women gyrated against each other and then shared a long lengthy kiss while the young man screamed, "That's what I'm talkin' about!" The other young men in this group were shaking cans of spray paint and grinning at us to see if we would put down our signs.

At this point, I was not frightened but I felt sorry for this college crowd.They had the nerve to suggest that their reproductive rights were being violated,while they spewed filth about all the ways you should spread STD's. It became increasingly apparent that this group was not exercising their freedom of speech, rather they were simply taking license to distort the truth. We saw signs that read: "SLUTS FOR CHOICE", "QUEERS FOR REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS", "KEEP YOUR ROSARIES OFF MY OVARIES", "PRO FAMILY, PRO CHILD, PRO CHOICE", "GREAT GRANDMA FOR CHOICE", "FATHER FOR CHOICE", "RACISM", and "CATHOLICS FOR CHOICE". All these signs were mingled with the "KEEP ABORTION LEGAL", "STOP THE WAR ON WOMEN" and assorted filthy signs held by every age group. Making her way through the crowd was a woman who was dressed as a large vagina, dancing and singing the praises of safe abortion. When the pro-choice women saw our signs they screamed at us calling us "BIBLE BIGOTS" and chanting "CHURCH AND STATE SEPARATE!" We remained silent as they became violent in their verbal attacks.

As the parade progressed the "celebrity" busses passed by filled with another angry bunch of women with an agenda to push. Ashley Judd and Whoopi Goldberg were probably the biggest draw for the feminists and they didn't disappoint the crowd. Whoopi continually misrepresents the Catholic Church and her teachings as she waves her coat hanger with such conviction. She is so convinced that women need the right to kill their babies by legal abortion or they will die by their own desperate hands. Here is where Whoopi and I part ways. As my sign said very plainly, "Women Killed By Legal Abortion".The pro-choice feminists in the crowd repeatedly asked me, "What about the women who died from illegal abortion?" Are these women the only ones the choice community is concerned with and will recognize as important? Did the feminists miss something? Are they telling me that my daughter's brutal death isn't important because ABORTION WAS LEGAL THEN! So when Whoopi is waving her hanger, she really doesn't care about any of the women who have died or the grieving families they left behind. she doesn't care if Marla was lied to and really had no choice. She doesn't care that Marla was brutally butchered in a state of the art Women's Hospital. No coat hangers. No back alley. No choice. Whoppi's agenda is to keep abortion legal and keep the killing profitable. Yes, let's not forget that the abortion industry is a huge money maker and they want to continue business as usual no matter what the cost is in broken lives and grieving hearts. Planned Parenthood, under the direction of Margaret Sanger, was designed to RID society of minorities, so that there would be less Whoopis in this world. How could anyone embrace and support such a group. Have women bought the lie so long that they can no longer think for themselves? My only conclusion is : If women died before abortion was legal, making it an unsafe medical procedure AND women are still dying now that abortion is legal, IT IS STILL AN UNSAFE MEDICAL PROCEEDURE!

As part of the Silent No More Awareness Organization, my only concern was to give ALL women a voice no matter what political or moral side they represented. I didn't ask if they were pro-choice or pro-life, hurting hearts come from both sides of this issue. It was my goal to reach as many hearts as possible and if I was able to change only one, that would be enough for me. Am I glad I went to Washington? Yes, because it only shows us that we have so much to do as a pro-life community. We need to be teaching our children how to be strong in their faith and how to protect and defend life. We need to speak openly about abortion and the after effects so that we can reach those hearts who have lost all hope. We need to promote chastity and re enforce to our teens that true love waits. We need to give our youth the knowledge they need to go out in this world and proclaim the Gospel of Life.This is our responsibility and if we continue to ignore it we leave our teens in the hands of Planned Parenthood. They have had enough time to continue to spread their lies. The biggest lie I heard was "PRO-LIFE ,THAT'S A LIE, YOU DON'T CARE IF WOMEN DIE!" If we actively prepare our teens for this horrific barrage of feminist garbage they will be as effective as the young adults from Penn State who came with us and proudly wore tee shirts that said, "WE ARE....PRO-LIFE!"

Did we make a difference? Definitely! As we were standing in protest, a women carrying a sign that read, "PRO-CHOICE", came over to Janet Morana and said, "I don't know why I am carrying this, can I hold one of yours?" As her tears fell, there was a story to be told and a heart to be healed. All she needed was to see that it was possible to regret and find peace in the mercy of Christ. That's what we came for and that's what we prayed for. So in the 700,000 angry women, we found one who needed to know that she was not alone.

I call that a victory!

Deborah Cardamone

For more information about Silent No More Awareness, log on to: www.silentnomoreawareness.org

To read Marla's story: Marla Ann Cardamone

If you want Debbie to speak to your group, post a message here or email me, and I'll pass it along.

NOTE: Though Debbie's not allowed to say where the abortion took place, it was at Magee Women's Hospital. I found that out before the case settled, so I'm not bound by the confidentiality clause that binds the lips of Marla's family.

1 comment:

Cecilia said...

I think Deborah should personally sue the social worker who browbeat her daughter inyo an abortion. After all, if that social worker had respected Marla's no, Marla would still be with us.